


HAJIN

by msinpinitu (Knaija)



Series: Sasaeng [2]
Category: Infinite (Band)
Genre: Angst, Homophobic Language, Prison, Psychopath, Self-inflicted Injuries, Stalking, Violence, idolverse, inappropriate feelings, very disturbing, woogyu is mentioned
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-13
Updated: 2017-06-13
Packaged: 2018-11-13 16:24:12
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,470
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11188890
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Knaija/pseuds/msinpinitu
Summary: Not that crazy Hajin ever needed closure, but the fic just sorta appeared in my head and I had to indulge my muse.





	HAJIN

**Author's Note:**

> The author did not fact-check the Korean Criminal System before writing this so…

Hajin climbed onto the bed she’d been assigned to in a hall of about twelve other bunks and sat, letting her legs dangle beneath as she took in the quiet depression of her situation.

 _“Hajin, what the fuck are you doing?”_ Sunggyu had asked, looking at her in more confusion than he’d ever felt since the first day they’d met. She didn’t know what she was doing either. Love had pushed her that far. She’d believed love would continue to be on her side.

 _“That was a joke, Hajin.”_ He’d said. All the times he’d proclaimed his love for her. All the times he’d told her she was his “special girl”… it had all been a joke. But Hajin had fallen for it. Kim Sunggyu was the love of her life. Even if he didn’t know it. Even if he didn’t want to acknowledge it.

Falling on her bed, she clenched her fists as she struggled to keep the tears from falling. He hadn’t come to her hearing and she did not expect him to visit. She wasn’t going to cry.

Even though she knew she’d never see Kim Sunggyu again.

*********

Hajin kept to herself for the most part. She didn’t want the trouble. Serving six to ten years for kidnapping Woohyun was only going to get shorter if she behaved herself. She would be up for parole in six years. She could do this. If the older women asked for her food, she gave it without question. If they asked her to stand up, she obeyed. No matter how absurd it seemed, she obeyed.

She took her showers in the last stall, waiting till the last moment when the showers were almost empty and she kept to herself.

But then one morning, a woman –almost a girl- had approached her in the shower and Hajin had gone tense, thinking the worst was going to happen.

“You’re the girl who took Nam Woohyun.”

It wasn’t a question, so Hajin didn’t answer.

“What did you do to him?” She asked.

“Nothing.”

“Why did you take him?”

Hajin gulped and lied.

“I was a fan.”

She was not a fan. She’d barely tolerated Woohyun’s hold over Sunggyu for all the years that she’d known him. She hated how much power he had over Sunggyu and she hated that he had turned Sunggyu into a lovesick idiot who only ever saw Woohyun when Woohyun was in the room.

But then she’d found that diary. And she’d just snapped. Woohyun was in love with Sunggyu too. And if they both found out that they both loved each other, then they’d get together. And then they’d leave her alone. And then she’d be- ARGHHH!

Hajin wished she’d at least had the chance to drive a sharp blade through Woohyun’s belly.

“If it was me,” the girl said. “If I had Woohyun all tied up and at my mercy… the things I’d do to him.”

Hajin had tried to do things, but nothing had worked. The foolish idiot was too scared, or too much of a faggot to react to a woman. A real flesh and blood woman offering him her body. But if it was Sunggyu, Woohyun would have opened up and come like a bucking bronco.

“I didn’t do anything to him.” She said, stepping under the spray of the shower.

“Liar.” The girl said, spitting on the floor. “You’re such a dirty liar.”

“I’m sorry.” Hajin said, bowing at the girl, as she turned off the shower and tried to leave but two other girls blocked her way. “I’m not looking for trouble.”

“I’m looking for trouble.” The first girl said. “You hurt Hyunie-oppa.”

“I didn’t-”

One of the other girls slapped her across the face as Hajin slid on the slippery floor, only managing to hold herself up from falling.

“I hear you stabbed Sunggyu too.” The slapper said. “What? Were you going to assassinate Hoya next? Or the maknae?”

“It was just a mistake.” She tried to explain.

“LIAR!” the first girl screamed. “Sunggyu-oppa trusted you.”

The third girl tried to slap her but Hajin blocked that one, opening herself up for a second slap by the first girl who slapped her. As she banged against the bathroom wall, Hajin screamed, causing all three girls to startle at first.

But then they quickly recovered, choosing to rain down on her with their fists and their feet as the guards came rushing into the bathroom. She wasn’t sure how long it lasted, but in the time it took them to rescue her, Hajin was sure she’d been bitten, punched, kicked and she knew something in her knee must have shifted.

“EVERYBODY GET DOWN!” The guard shouted as the girls shifted, raising their hands and falling to the ground beside Hajin as she struggled not to cry.

However, it didn’t take long for her to realize, that her face wasn’t just wet from the shower anymore.

*********

The doctor reset her knee two counts into the three counts that he’d promised her. As she screamed into the pillow she was holding over her head, she realized that she was scared to go back to her cell block. What if they weren’t satisfied? What if she got jumped at night when the guards were sluggish and the gates were locked? What if someone decided to use a knife next time?

Unless she got herself a knife. She had a toothbrush. But did she really need it in the larger scheme of things? She could go without dental hygiene if only it would guarantee her safety. It wouldn’t be too hard. Their bunks were made from metal. If she was careful enough, Hajin knew she could shave it into a weapon. Or better yet, shave the bottom of the brush into a weapon so she could still brush her mouth with it.

“Take the pillow off before you suffocate.” The doctor said as she dropped it on the bed but remained reclined, feeling him sit as he elevated her leg to the bench between them so he could strap on a brace. “You’re new here.”

“Yes.” She said tightly.

“Not so good at make friends, huh?”

She didn’t reply to that. She could make friends if she wanted. Regardless of the crazy inmates who had just attacked her, she was sure there were people who would react positively to a little flattery, or some serious ass-kissing. She could survive this. She was going to survive this.

Hajin knew she had to get out of prison alive… not in a body bag. She had to see Sunggyu again. No matter what it took. If she could apologize, she knew he would listen. Everything would be okay. Six years, right?

“It’s hard at first.” The doctor said as she finally looked at him, taking in the name on his tag.

“Dr. Kim.” She said, sitting up to touch the tag. “What’s your full name?” She asked

“Kim Sungmin.” He answered.

She nearly laughed at the similarity between his name and Sunggyu’s.

“Are you the only doctor here?”

“Yes, but I have two nurses.” He offered, smiling at her charmingly. “If you need a woman to see to-”

“It’s fine.” She caressed the tag again as he laughed a little and sat back, letting her hands fall from his chest. “I don’t mind being your patient.”

When he laughed again, it didn’t seem as charming as before. Instead, a slight blush began to creep up his neck as he focused on strapping her brace back. Now that he’d gotten her attention, Hajin couldn’t look away. She was beginning to notice things she hadn’t noticed when she’d been brought in with her dislocated knee. Dr. Kim didn’t just share Sunggyu’s surname, he had almost the same nose. And she knew that if she could just get him to lay off the hair gel, his hair would fall over his eyes and reveal that god-awful idle parting that was Sunggyu’s signature style.

Yes, she could just see it.

She lifted her hand and ran it through his hair as he shook his head out of her reach, smiling at her.

“You’re very touchy.” He commented.

“I don’t mind touchy people too.” She said. She never had. It had taken years to get Sunggyu to stop being so weird every time she threw herself on him. But they’d never really gotten past his nervousness till they’d both run away to Seoul and had to share a bed for a few months before he got accepted into Woollim.

Those had been the best months of her life. She’d slept in his arms and sometimes, she was glad to note, that she’d woken up and Sunggyu was holding her too.

 _“That was a joke, Hajin.”_ Sunggyu had said that day at the bar. He’d renounced everything they’d felt for each other.

Because of Woohyun.

“You’re a doctor.” She told Dr. Kim. “Is it acceptable for you to use so much hair gel?” She teased.

“It’s not hair gel.” He said as Hajin raised her eyebrows at him and he sighed. “It’s not against the rules to use hair gel.” He stated.

“I don’t like the gel.” She said. “Stop using it.”

He looked speechless for a few seconds. Then he looked back at her braced and fastened it.

“There you go.” He helped her off the bench and onto the floor. “Try to keep it dry. The guards would set up a harness for you to shower with.”He pressed a button on the wall and the gate connecting the infirmary to the prison yard buzzed open as a female guard stepped through. “We’re done.” He said.

Hajin smiled to herself because that could not have been more untrue.

*********

As she entered the yard, she found that she was being led away from the other inmates.

“What… what is it? What did I do?”

“You have a visitor.” The guard said and Hajin felt her heart drop. She’d told her mother not to visit. Her father hadn’t even come for the hearing. But she knew her mother would not listen.

As she walked into the visiting room with the glass separating the inmates from the visitors, she couldn’t believe her eyes.

Sitting on the other side of one of the cubicles, was Sunggyu.

Not knowing what to do, she tried to ignore the pain in her leg as she limped over to him, wishing the brace was on top of her trousers so that Sunggyu could see that something had happened to her… that she was in pain somehow.

She sat and picked up the phone.

“You came.” She said.

“Yeah.” He replied, watching her calmly from across the table. Hajin felt shaky. She really wasn’t ready for this. How could she face him so soon?

“I didn’t think you’d come to my hearing. I just…” _thought you’d at least care_ , she didn’t say, realizing mid-sentence that, of course he was not going to care. She should have known he’d take Woohyun’s side over hers. When she realized he wasn’t going to acknowledge her injury, she winced. “There’re a few Inspirits on my cell block.”

She watched and waited as he suddenly realized that she’d been hurt. She knew the moment it happened because he’d gone from being a wall, to looking worried about her. But then the wall was back up.

“You should never forgive me.” She said, praying for some forgiveness.

“I don’t plan to.” He stated and a part of her nearly died.

“Oh.” She said. He must have come here to hurt her. He must have come to drag her pain through the mud and bare all her wounds just so she could hurt some more.

As he got up to leave, Hajin wasn’t sure if she hated him in that moment, or if she was just afraid that she’d never see him again. Either way, her mouth began moving on it’s own.

“I’m sorry and I regret how it all went down but Sunggyu, you should know.”

“What?” he asked.

“If I had the chance, I’d most likely still do the same thing.” She said.

He stared at through the glass with such hate like she’d never seen. If she’d had any doubts before, they were all cleared up by the finality in his eyes. As she suddenly regretted her words, she began to take it back.

“Being in love with you-” She said as he hung the phone back into place, shutting her up. “Sunggyu.” She said.

As he left her, Hajin knew she’d never see Sunggyu again.

*********

That night, she slept with one eye open, holding her blunt toothbrush in her hand and wondering if there were more Inspirits in the prison… if some of them were locked in the exact same room as her at the moment. She couldn’t get rid of her fear but she was very relieved to wake up in the morning with no new bruises and no one giving her bad eyes.

As she went to take a bath, she carefully strapped her leg up into the harness and turned on the shower as the water poured down her body. As she closed her eyes, she saw Sunggyu again. She saw his hatred and she hated herself for letting him have so much power over her.

One little mistake and he’d tossed her aside like she never matter. He was supposed to be on her side but he’d chosen others over her. And now she was all alone.

Well, not completely alone, she thought, looking down at the harness as she remembered Dr. Kim Sungmin. Who was probably sitting in his office, doing nothing.

Hajin unstrapped her leg from the harness and walked over to where the mirrors were on the other side of the empty shower. She looked at her body, at the swell of her perky breast and the gentle slope down into her flat tummy. Any man would want her. Any man would be lucky enough to have her. Her next check up was in two weeks when Dr. Kim had promised he’d take the brace off.

She didn’t think she could wait. She had to see him again. She had to look into his eyes. She wanted to know if he’d listened to her. If he’d stopped using the gel.

Hajin had to know now.

Throwing her head back, she slammed into the mirror as she waited, feeling the world spin around her. She could feel the powdering crust of the broken pieces tear at her skin and slip into the wounds, but she didn’t care. She pulled herself back from the wall as she examined the mess she had just made of her head.

Dr. Kim was going to pay attention.

Whether he wanted to or not.


End file.
